"Good morning miss"
"Can I help you son?"
"Sixteen today and up for fun"
"I'm a big boy now or so they say so if you'll serve me I'll be on my way"

"Box of balloons, with the feather-light touch"
"Pack of party poppers, that pop in the night"
A toothbrush and hairspray, plastic grin
Mrs Clay on the corner has just walked in
Welcome to the house of fun now I've come of age
Welcome to the house of fun
Welcome to the lion's den, temptation's on it's way
Welcome to the house of…

"N-n-n-n-no, no Miss, you misunderstood"
"Sixteen, big boy, full pint in my manhood"
"I'm up to date and the date's today so if you'll serve me I'll be on my way"
Welcome to the house of fun now I've come of age
Welcome to the lion's den, temptation's on it's way
Welcome to the house of fun

"I'm sorry son but we don't stock party gimmicks in this shop"
"Try 'The House Of Fun' it's quicker if you run"
"This is a chemist, not a joke shop"
"Party hats, simple enough clear"
"Comprehend savvy understand"
"Do you hear?"
"A pack or party hats with the coloured tips"
Too late, Gorgon has heard gossip
"Well hello Joe"
"Hello Miss Clay"
"Many happy returns from the day"
Welcome to the house of fun now I've come of age
Welcome to the house of fun
Welcome to the lion's den, temptation's on it's way
Welcome to the house of fun
Welcome to the house of fun, now I've come of age
Welcome to the house of fun
Welcome to the lion's den, temptation's on it's way
Welcome to the house of fun
Welcome to the house of fun, now I've come of age
Welcome to the house of…