Joy to the world while you're decking all the halls
Ya better watch out or we'll kick you in the balls
Here we come a-wassailing Feliz Navidad
Grandma got run over by a reindeer fa-la-la

Crush your balls with a sleigh
Jingle bells in your face

[Chorus:] Jingle bell jingle bell jingle bell metal
Fucking shit up with a double bass pedal
Ring-a-ling hear them ring, jolly and brutal
Escape from this very merry medley is futile

Dashing through the snow in a wintry wonderland
The little drummer boy never really had a band
Come all ye faithful in a manger heard on high
Do you hear what I hear, silver bells, rum-pum-pum

[Chorus:]