I got friends to no end most of them I never met / I got it bad for girls in Cali that I'll probably never get to kick it with and isn't it a bit of a trip the way these myspace chicks always pucker their lips? / look on their face like, "come get with this" / cell phone photos of their butt and their breasticess / they want me bad, at least according to their messages / but I ain't never met one of these girls in real life / like Tila Tequila man, I feel ya but, really? / you look good but to me you're straight silly / but me, I'm desperate / friends list desolate / look who's next to get at you online

add me! / PLEASE! / please can I be your friend / I promise that I won't stalk you again
add me! / PLEASE! / please put me on your list / you've got thousands why did I get dissed?
add me! / PLEASE! / please can I be in your crew / I won't tell 'em that those photos ain't you
add me! / PLEASE! / please tell me what I have to do just to be fucking friends with you!

What up, fellas where my homeboys at? / and I ain't talking 'bout you chest waxin' modeling cats / I'm speakin' to you if you dirty dirty murderin' tracks / or if you real when you hit me I'm a hit you right back / and on that note I'm looking for a bit of advice / 'cause web sites ain't no way to spend my friday nights / I need a low budget pornstar blond / but when I hit up Dillontron, son she didn't respond / I was like "nice jugs" and "damn girl, you look hella tight" / and knowing me I didn't spell "jugs" right / but ain't nobody said that spelling counts here / I was just trying to make it clear

add me! / PLEASE! / please can I be your friend / I promise that I won't stalk you again
add me! / PLEASE! / please put me on your list / you've got thousands why did I get dissed?
add me! / PLEASE! / please can I be in your crew / I won't tell 'em that those photos ain't you
add me! / PLEASE! / please tell me what I have to do just to be fucking friends with you!

I know that you got friends like Hova's got a Maybach Benz
and I just can't comprehend why I'm not one of them
is it 'cause I've got a lazy eye and a psychopathic grin?
or are you just so fly you've got a reputation to defend? well I don't care!